Friday, February 19, 2010

WORST BODY IMAGE LOOKS FOR 2009

While 2009 may just go down as the Year of Scandalous Photoshopping, the past year has been filled with celebrity diets, fat-vs-fit debates and, of course, moobies. Mad Men helped curves shine, ESPN The Magazine convinced America’s top athletes to strip down and pose naked and the massive weight losses celebrated on Biggest Loser had viewers crying “eating disorder!” 
But those are practically baby potatoes compared to some of the whoppers that went down. Without further adieu, I present you with the Top 10 Craziest Moments in Body Image, Version 2009:

10. Oprah still can’t believe she’s talking about her weight
January 
The queen of talk shows publicly lamented her ever-yoyoing waistline. A few months later, she chatted with Kirstie Alley about falling off their respective wagons.

9. Michelle Obama’s arms are named Vice President and Secretary of State (photo credit: Getty Images)
February 
Toned biceps are OK, but knee-length shorts? Oh, no she didn’t!
8. Susan Boyle gets a makeover
April 
Britain's Got Talent's hottest (but homeliest) star was no longer a "hairy angel" (as she was called by the British press) after nabbing herself an astonishing makeover, complete with newly brunette hair, plucked eyebrows and Burberry scarf.


7. Glamour features Lizzi Miller in the buff (photo credit: Glamour)
August 
Real women everywhere cheered for the mystery woman on page 194 of the lady mag’s September issue.

6. Ralph Lauren model Filippa Hamilton was digitally whittled and twisted into a comically carnivalesque Laffy Taffy of a human being   
September 
She later divuldged that she’d actually been fired, at 5’11” and 120 pounds, for being “too fat.”

5. Barbie has cankles
October
That sound you hear? It’s my old childhood Cabbage Patch Kid, Melody Reindeer Goldenstein, weeping softly.

4. Fox NFL and Burger King openly mock Jessica Simpson's weight  
October
Responding to public outrage, Fox quickly apologized, admitting, “our poor attempt at humor was insensitive.”

3. In Precious, Gabourey Sidibe  offers viewers a leading star unlike any we’ve ever seen (photo credit: Getty Images)   
November
I just wonder how long until she gets a Susan Boyle makeover and loses weight


2. Researchers conclude even preschoolers get depressed by airbrushing 
November
Whatever happened to believing in the Tooth Fairy and coloring inside the lines?


1. Demi Moore loses a chunk of hip in a freak Photoshopping accident 
November
Maybe it’s hanging out with Filippa Hamilton’s pelvis?

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